please tell me it isn't so...

I was just about to give up on this on-line dating thing, when I came across an email from a rather charming young man. He had visited my site on several occasions and had sent a couple of "hello's". Because I was completely exhausted from this game of dating, I brushed past him. On one particular evening, in my desperation, I decided to give it another try. I said "hello" and began the typical match "courting".

He was cute, smart, witty, and with a decent job. He seemed normal enough and we carried on quite a few enticing conversations. After a long, holiday weekend, he sent a sweet email asking about my weekend and fun with friends. He went on to say that he spent the weekend sailing and grilling with friends and family. Enchanting. As I read his invitation to meet, I actually had a little bit of excitement in me at the thought of sharing some adventures with such a charming gent. In the midst of a perfectly normal letter...he said that he had to know...

I was reading the email aloud to my girlfriend at the time. In an exciting tone, with sweetness in my fluctuations...when I came to this line...I stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn't even read the next sentence out loud. My jaw was to the ground and I was speechless. Now, let me explain by saying that my friend and I, when discussing men in general, are NEVER speechless. When I couldn't continue with the letter...she seemed as shocked as I.

"DO YOU COME WITH A BOOTY?"

I have read some dumb things. I have heard some crazy lines come from the mouths of these creatures...but this? Really? Do I come with a booty? Well, I don't know. Do you come with any common sense? A mother, perhaps, who taught you any manners? Because clearly...you come with balls....and that's it. At that moment, I questioned why I am even attracted to this species. I mean, really. I love men. I am attracted to men. I want clearly to find a partner in a man...but MEN...please, help me out here. You appear completely normal and then BAM!!! Out of no where, you hit an innocent woman with this...

Please tell me it isn't so.